Return to the index
Take the reader survey
When we last left Sarah Beloit, she was trying to find something that would give her the hiccups for her boyfriend Nathan. Today she gets to try again, and as it turns out, she's met with good news. By the way, if you aren't familiar with Sarah or Nathan, you might want to read this episode first. --The Author
It had been a couple weeks since Sarah had bought her little bottle of Chris's favorite fire sauce, hoping to be able to use it to induce hiccups. She had been especially busy with school, work, and other activities, and hadn't gotten around to trying it. Now, on this particular weekday afternoon, she was in her room after getting home from school, without very much to do. Her parents and Chris were not at home, and Amanda was busy with homework. Happening to think of the little bottle stashed away in one of her drawers, Sarah decided it would be a great time to try giving herself the hiccups.
As she had attempted to do the time her mom had interrupted her, she got herself a small spoonful of the sauce. Just as she was lifting it to her mouth, there was a knock on her door. Sarah grimaced. "What is it?" she called.
"Hey Sarah," her little sister Amanda answered. "Can you help me with my homework?"
Quickly but carefully putting the bottle and half-filled spoon back into the drawer, she replied, "Sure, come on in."
Amanda needed quite a bit of help with her math, but eventually she got it figured out and returned to her own room to finish working her problems.
Once again, Sarah produced the spoon of super-hot sauce, and this time, she managed to down the fiery liquid. It burned her throat just a little, but didn't produce anything resembling the hiccups. After waiting a few minutes, she decided to try again. This time she used just a tiny bit more, and after swallowing it, she did indeed hiccup - twice.
Encouraged, she tried once more, and this time, hardly had she swallowed before the hiccups started, and this time they didn't stop. Much like her "natural" hiccups, they were hard and rather evenly spaced, a few seconds apart. She stood before her mirror for a minute or two, admiring her self-induced hiccups. Just as her natural hiccups did, each one of these made her entire body bounce obviously.
Once again there was a knock on her door. "Sarah, can you come help me?" Amanda asked from outside.
"Sure," Sarah agreed, and opened the door. "Still *hulk* having trouble?"
Amanda nodded. "Yeah, I just can't *hic* figure it out," she complained, interrupted by a hiccup of her own. "Man, *hic* I got the hiccups a-*hic* again!"
Sarah laughed. "So do I! *hulk*"
"Yeah, bu-*hic* but you like *hmk* having them. I d-*hic* don't! And I've *hic* had them like a-*hic* all day, off *hmk* and on," Amanda complained as she and Sarah returned to her room. "People were *hmk* making fun *hic* of me all d-*hic* day about them. *hic* I would have th-*hic* them for like *hmk* thirty minutes and then th-*hic* they would go away for ten or *hic* fifteen minutes, and *hmk* then come back. *hmmk* They're so freakin' bad!"
"Aww, I'm *huck* sorry," Sarah sympathized.
Amanda was the sweetest little fourteen-year-old girl you could ever meet. Though she was a little shy, she was very friendly once you got to know her, and had many good friends. With long, dark brown hair, a very pretty face and eyes, and a thin but well-shaped body, many people said she looked a bit older than she really was. Most of the guys at school thought she was "hot", but she didn't have a boyfriend yet. As she explained to her girl friends, she was very picky and so she was still looking! Like her brother, she got hiccups rarely, and didn't enjoy them at all.
Amanda was generally a pretty good student, but math really gave her trouble, as it was doing now. The two hiccupping sisters discussed the homework for a while as she tried to understand the concepts involved. She was getting annoyed not only because she just couldn't seem to grasp the solution to her math problems, but also because her quiet but incessant hiccups were really bothering her.
After they had been working for a while, Sarah left for a minute to go to the restroom. While she was gone, the phone rang. Assuming it was one of their parents, Amanda decided to answer. Picking up the phone just as she hiccupped, she answered, "Hello, Beloit's residence."
The male voice on the other end of the line was definitely not Mr. Beloit's. "Hi, is this Amanda?"
"Yes, this *hmk* is she," she answered, trying to figure out who it was.
"This is Nathan," he said, "How are you doing?"
"Oh, *hmk* hi, Nathan," Amanda greeted him, now recognizing the voice of Sarah's boyfriend. "I'm doing pr-*hic* pretty good, except *hmk* for two things."
"And what are those two things?" Nathan asked.
"Homework *hic* and hiccups. *hmk* They're both very b-*hic* bothersome," Amanda laughed. "And *hic* how are you?"
"I'm doing great," Nathan answered happily. "What kind of homework are you doing?"
Amanda sighed. "Math. It's *hmk* so long and h-*hic* hard."
"Yeah, math is pretty hard sometimes. Just keep working and you'll get it," Nathan said encouragingly.
"I *hic* know," Amanda said. "I'm get-*hic* getting tired of *hmk* it, though. *hmk* And I'm *hic* getting tired of th-*hic* these hiccups, too. *hmk*"
"Aww, but they're cute," Nathan objected.
Amanda laughed. "You would *hmk* think that, w-*hic* wouldn't you?"
"Yes, I would!" he answered teasingly. "But anyway, is Sarah there?"
"Yeah, *hmmk* she is, just a *hmk* minute," Amanda said.
"OK, thanks sweetie," Nathan replied, as Amanda put down the phone and ran to tell Sarah that he was waiting for her.
"Tell him *hulk* I'll be there in just a m-*hic* minute," Sarah called from the bathroom, happy that Nathan was finally going to be able to talk to her when she had the hiccups.
Returning to the phone, Amanda relayed the message to Nathan. "She'll be *hic* here in j-*hic* just a minute. *hmk*"
"All right, thanks," Nathan said. "So how did you get those hiccups, anyway?" he asked as the telephone relayed a few more of Amanda's helpless hiccups to his ear.
"I *hmk* don't know," she admitted. "I've h-*hic* had them most *hmk* of today an- and yesterday. *hmk* They just st-*hic* started yester-*hic*-day morning and *hmk* haven't wanted t-*hic* to stop for *hmk* more than like fifteen *hic* minutes. *hmk* They don't h-*hic* really hurt but *hic* they're an-*hic* annoying. And *hic* at school th-*hic* they were really *hmk* embarrass-*hic* embarrassing. *hic*"
"I bet they would be," Nathan sympathized.
"Yeah, *hmk* I wish they'd *hic* go away," Amanda complained. "Oh, *hic* Sarah's here now," she added. "So h-*hic* here she is."
"OK, thanks Mandy, you have a good night."
"Bye," Amanda said, handing the phone to Sarah. "It's *hic* Nathan."
Sarah answered cheerily, "Hey, what's up?"
"Hi honey," he said as Sarah hiccupped loudly. "Do you really have the hiccups too?"
She giggled. "Yep, I sure *huck* do!"
"Wow!" Nathan gasped, obviously surprised. "How did you and Mandy manage to get the hiccups at the same time?
"I don't know, *huck* just lucky, I g-*hic* guess," Sarah replied, deciding not to tell him about her little secret yet.
"They sound great," Nathan stammered.
Sarah laughed again. "I *hulk* think so too!"
Nathan was quiet for a moment. Finally he spoke, "Well, umm, the reason I called is, uh, well, I was wondering if you'd be able to go out to supper with me tonight. Nothing fancy, just a quick dinner, you know."
"Wow," Sarah answered, surprised. "That's *hulk* not like you to *hic* not, like, have it a-*hic* planned out way *huck* before now. *hic* But sure, *huck* sounds great!"
"Yeah, sorry about the short notice," he apologized. "I'd been meaning to call you sooner but, uh, I was busy."
"That's *huck* ok, sweetie, when sh-*hic* should I be ready? *hic-ulk*"
"Thirty minutes?" he suggested.
"I *hic* have a few th-*hic* things I have to *huck* finish first. *huck* Can we m-*hic* make it forty-*hic* five?" she asked.
"All right," Nathan agreed. "I'll see you then. Bye, honey."
Sarah was surprised by how quick he was to say goodbye, especially since she had the hiccups, which she knew he loved. But she said goodbye and hung up the phone. "I w-*hic* wonder what was up *huck* with Nathan," she commented to Amanda, who looked up from her homework. "He's *hic* never like that."
"What d-*hic* do you m-*hmk* mean?" Amanda asked, puzzled. "He didn't *hmk* seem any d-*hic* different *hmk* to me."
"Well, *hic* you know, I th-*hic* thought he'd want to *huck* like, talk longer, es-*hic* especially with *hic* me hiccupping like th-*huck* this. And *hic* he never does st-*huck* stuff on such *hic* short notice."
"Come *hmk* on, Sarah, *hic* he was j-*hic* just like, in *hic* shock from h-*hic* hearing both of *hmk* us with th-*hic* the hiccups," Amanda explained. "And I *hmk* bet th-*hmk* that's why *hic* he asked y-*hic* you out, *hic* too."
Sarah wasn't totally convinced. "I don't know, *hic* but either way, he's c-*hic* coming in a little *huck* bit, so *huck* I have to get ready *hic* soon. Did y-*hic* you figure out your ma-*hic*-th lesson?"
After a few minutes of help, Amanda finally understood the assignment, and as she got working on it, Sarah went to get ready for her sudden date. She always liked dressing in clothes that clung rather tightly to her slim figure - especially when she had the hiccups. Thus she put on a nice pair of pants with a small white spaghetti-strap top which seemed to help accentuate her hiccups' effects on her body. She wore a long-sleeved shirt unbuttoned over it, since it was a little chilly outside. She did her hair the way she knew he liked it, and after she was all done primping, she went to the door of Amanda's room, where her sister was laboring over her last math problem. Amanda's hiccups had left her, but although Sarah's were still going strong, she didn't notice her older sister standing in her doorway.
"How d-*huck* do I look?" Sarah asked.
Amanda practically jumped up from her paper, startled. "Oh, um, yeah, you look great," she answered, getting up and straightening a misplaced lock of Sarah's beautiful light-brown hair. "There, that's even *hic* better," she commented, interrupted by a sudden hiccup. "Oh God, not a-*hic* again!" she wailed. "I think y-*hmmk* you scared the *hmk* hiccups back into m-*hic* me."
"Oh no, I'm *huck* sorry," Sarah apologized. "I always thought th-*hic* that scaring would cure hi-*huck* hiccups, not cause them! *huck*"
"It's ok, *hic* they were pr-*uck* probably just loo-*hic* looking for an *hmk* excuse to come b-*hic* back. But *hic* anyway, yeah, *hmk* you look re-*hic* really nice. *hmk* That's a ve-*hic* very pretty sh-*hic* shirt."
"Thanks," Sarah said, "I hope *hic* Nathan likes it, too."
"I'm *hic* sure he w-*hic* will," Amanda assured, just as the doorbell sounded.
Sarah glanced at the clock. "That must be h-*huck* him. *hic* Can you answer th-*hulk* the door while I *hic* get my purse?"
It was indeed Nathan at the door. "Hey, *hic* Nathan," Amanda greeted him. "Come on *hmk* in, Sarah's ju-*hic* just about ready *hic* to go."
"Thank you," he said as he entered. "How are you doing tonight?"
"Better th-*hic* than I was *hic* when you c-*hic* called," she answered pleasantly. "Although *hmk* Sarah did j-*hic* just bring my *hic* hiccups back."
Nathan laughed. "You poor thing! How did she do that?"
"She *hic* startled me a-*hic* and they just *hmk* came back. *hic* But I'm *hmk* ok with it *hic* now cause I *huck* I'm done with *hic* my math. *hic* You wouldn't b-*hic* believe how *hmk* hard it is for m-*hic* me to d-*hic* do homework *hic* with the h-*hmk* hiccups, cause th-*hic* they're so dis-*hic* distracting. *hic*"
"I bet they are," he sympathized. "Especially with them being so fast."
"Uh huh," Amanda agreed, "I *hic* have no idea w-*hic* why they're s-*hic* so bad ri-*hmk* right now."
As they continued with small talk, Sarah emerged.
"Hey honey," Nathan said as she entered. "You look beautiful tonight, as always."
"*huck* Why thank you," Sarah answered happily.
"Ready to go?"
As Sarah opened her mouth to answer, the phone rang. When Amanda ran to answer it, Sarah replied, "Yeah, let's just wait and see *huck* if the phone is for m-*hic* me."
"Oh, *hic* hi Hannah, *hmk* what's up?" they heard Amanda say to the person on the phone.
"OK, we can g-*hic* go, she wouldn't be *hulk* calling for me," Sarah stated. She waved to Amanda as they left.
Not surprisingly, Hannah was calling for Chris, but she and Amanda talked for quite a while, as both of them were at home alone with nothing to do. Talking tended to aggravate Amanda's already fast hiccups, but she didn't really notice as they chatted. Having the hiccups so often herself, Hannah didn't tease Amanda about her bad case, much to her relief. They just talked on and on with Amanda hiccupping through every sentence she spoke. They were still talking, and Amanda still hiccupping, when Mr. and Mrs. Beloit arrived home half an hour later.
* * * * *
"I'm glad *hic* Hannah called," Sarah said as she and Nathan drove out of their neighborhood. "I hate to *hulk* leave Mandy at home wi-*hic* with nothing to do *hic* like that. *hulk* She's so nice about *huck* it, though."
"Yeah, she's a real sweetie," Nathan agreed.
Sarah laughed. "And she has *huck* the hiccups sooo *huck* bad today! A lot *hic* worse than I *huck* do."
"But you know what? I still think I like yours better," Nathan whispered.
"Well guess what?" Sarah asked.
"Ummm... I give up. What?"
"Come on, guess!" Sarah demanded playfully.
Nathan had too much on his mind to think too hard, so he made a wild guess. "Uh, let's see... You won the lottery today?"
"No, no, *hic* it has to do with *huck* my hiccups."
"Ohhhh, um..." he thought again. "You had them all day, too?"
Sarah giggled. "No, not really. *huck* I found a way to gi-*huck* give them to myself! *hic*"
"Really?" Nathan asked incredulously. He tried to sound as enthusiastic as possible, but in a way, he felt sad - a little disappointed, because - no, he couldn't think about that right now.
Sarah didn't seem to notice his internal emotional struggle. "Absol-*hic-ulk* Absolutely!" she laughed. "It's right here in *hic* my purse." She brought out the little bottle.
"That's great!" Nathan said, with more joy than he felt. "I wouldn't have thought of that."
"It took a c-*hulk* couple tries, but it *hic* worked. So now *hulk* I can get them for *hulk* you any time!" she said, as she leaned over, put her arm around Nathan's neck and pulled him towards her a little so she could hiccup right into his ear.
Nathan laughed, as he tried to drive with Sarah pulling on him and hiccupping in his ear. He thought again of just how wonderful a girl she really was. "You're the greatest, sweetie," he whispered into her ear.
Although Nathan was obviously happy to be with her, and excited by her self-induced hiccups, Sarah still sensed that something wasn't right. "Is something wrong, hun?" she asked quietly.
"Uh," Nathan was silent for some time as he just held her bouncing body close to him with his free hand. Thoughts swirled through his mind. Finally, as they approached the city park, he spoke. "Yeah, there is something I need to talk to you about. Do you mind stopping here so we can talk?"
"Sure, that's fine," she agreed, wondering what could possibly be the matter. It couldn't be anything terribly bad - or could it?
As they walked down the path into the park, Nathan put his arm around Sarah's lower back, with his hand reaching around to her stomach. She slapped his hand playfully. "Get your hands off *hic* me! You just w-*hic* want to feel my *huck* hiccups!" she teased.
"Oh, sorry you feel that way," he said, moving his arm up to her shoulder. "That better?"
After they had silently walked a short distance into the park, she led him over to a small bench in a secluded area near some bushes. As they sat down together, Sarah once again asked what was wrong, as she silently prayed that it wouldn't be something terrible.
"Well, nothing is wrong. But I do have some news," he answered.
"Good news or *hic* bad news?"
"It's, ummm, both."
"OK, well, *huck* what is it?" she probed.
Nathan took a deep breath. "I've been, well, promoted. The Cardinals traded away Doug Jacobs, their triple-A second baseman, so they're moving me up from double-A into his place on the triple-A team."
Sarah knew how important baseball was in Nathan's life, and how much he dreamed of playing in the major leagues someday. He had spent the past couple years playing for the local double-A minor league team, affiliated with the St. Louis Cardinals, so she couldn't understand why his being promoted to triple-A - the last step before the majors - could be anything but good news.
"That's great, h-*huck* honey! I'm so happy fo-*hic* for you!" she gushed, giving him a quick hug. "Now you're *hic* just one step away f-*hic* from the major leagues!"
He got a faraway look in his eyes, as he thought of someday walking to the plate in a major league baseball game, taking pitches from the greatest players. Then he thought once again of the beautiful girl next to him, and he saddened a little. "That's right," he said, his voice trailing off.
"I'm really pr-*hulk* proud of you, my *hulk* ball-playing boy-*huck* boyfriend!" Sarah laughed, apparently oblivious to any negative aspects of the promotion. Almost without thinking, she asked, "So where does th-*hic* the Cards' triple-A *hic* team play?"
"Well, that's the part that's bad news," Nathan answered. "They play in Memphis."
Sarah thought for a moment. Geography was not her strong point - not even when it involved her own home state. "That's not *hic* too far away, *hic* right?"
"It's at the other end of the state, sweetie," he corrected. "Like eight hours from here."
"Ohhh *hulk*"
"I'm gonna have to move there, since it's way too far to go back and forth from here," he continued. "And I start in a week from today."
"You mean, *hic-ulk* You mean we only h-*hic* have one week left toge-*huck* together?" Sarah wailed. Suddenly she understood why Nathan had been acting so oddly all evening.
Nathan held her closer. "That's right. I'll be able to come back and visit sometimes, but - yeah, we only have one week to be together."
Tears came to Sarah's eyes. She thought of all the wonderful time she and Nathan had spent together - of how much their love for each other had grown. "I'll miss you *hic* so much," she whispered.
"I know, I'll miss you too. I wish I didn't have to leave, but I just can't --" he trailed off again, and they remained there for some time. He held her close as she quietly sobbed into his shoulder. Finally she regained her composure somewhat and spoke.
"Yes, I *huck* know you can't pass *huck* up this opportunity. *hic* You go and do your *hic* very best. I-*huck* I'll call you ev-*huck* every night. And at *hic* least we still h-*hic* have a week," she said encouragingly.
"That's right," Nathan agreed. "And let's make it the very best week it can possibly be!"
"That's a *hic* great idea! How sh-*hic* shall we start?" Sarah asked, slowly wiping the tears from her eyes.
Nathan smiled and hugged Sarah even closer to him. "You already did," he whispered. "You got the hiccups for me."
"Yeah *huck*, but I mean someth-*huck* something to *hic* do together. *hulk*" she clarified. "Cause I could *hulk* hiccup for you over *hic* the phone."
"Ohhh, that's true, and I hope you do!" Nathan said, as a smile began to play at the corners of his mouth. "You know, I've never kissed a girl while she had the hiccups."
Sarah pulled away from his embrace for a moment and looked him in the eye. "And you *hulk* want to fix th-*hulk* that?" she asked, smiling seductively.
"As a matter of fact, I do."
"Sounds like *huck* good news to me," she agreed, and as he brought her back into his arms, they shared the first of many kisses - the kind that not even the hardest of Sarah's hiccups could tear apart.