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Episode 24: Moment of Decision
It's promising to be a busy weekend, as Hannah and Nathan both pay a visit to Sarah on her college campus. Hannah is considering options for her educational future, while Sarah ponders what to do about her stagnating relationship with Nathan. Hannah has a while to figure things out, but Sarah has a major decision to make. --The Author
Sarah Beloit sat at the small desk in her dorm room, trying her best to catch up on her homework. It was only Thursday evening, but with an extra-busy weekend coming up, she didn't want to have a lot of homework waiting for her. It's always hard to focus on homework, but even more so when it's not at all interesting and not really due yet, so Sarah was having a bit of trouble concentrating. Be it checking Facebook, looking out her window at the last rays of twilight, or listening to snippets of conversations as people in the hallway passed by her door, anything seemed more interesting than her assignments.
Soon Sarah found yet another distraction. From outside in the hallway, she could hear the sound of someone with a case of the hiccups approaching her door. "I wonder if that's Melissa," Sarah mused. The hiccups were high-pitched and a little squeaky, just like Melissa's usually were. Spending so much time with her - they had quickly become best friends as well as roommates - Sarah had learned that Melissa got the hiccups often but was invariably able to cure them, so they never lasted long.
Sarah's guess was correct. "Hey girl!" Sarah greeted her roommate as she entered.
"Hey! I didn't *hmk* think I'd find you *heek* here," Melissa said.
Sarah frowned. "Yeah, I'm trying to get my homework done ahead of the weekend."
"Oh yeah, *heek* your boyfriend is c-*hilk* coming, isn't he?"
"Yes, plus my brother's girlfriend Hannah is coming too, for that college preview thing they're having," Sarah added.
"She's *hic* coming tonight, ri-*heek* right?" Melissa asked, with a look of frustration on her face after the latest squeaky hiccup. Her body barely moved, but her neck sucked in deeply with every hiccup. Her head jerked back just a tiny bit, making her ponytail of light blonde hair sway ever so slightly. "Just a second," she added before Sarah could answer. "I've *hic* got to get rid of th-*heek* get rid of these hiccups."
With that, she took a cup from next to their small sink, and filled it with water. Taking a large gulp of the water into her mouth, she bent over at the waist and then swallowed. Confident of her cure, she didn't even wait to see if they were gone, but said, "Sorry about that, the hiccups were driving me crazy. That's the third time I've had them today!"
Sarah laughed, "Well, one of us had to get them today."
Melissa giggled. "I guess you're right. But anyway, tell me about this Hannah girl. Is she coming to bowling night with us tonight?"
"I think so, if she wants to," Sarah guessed. "She should be here in half an hour or so. I hope you don't mind letting her stay with us."
"Oh, not at all," Melissa assured.
"She's such a cute girl; you're totally going to love her! Like seriously, she's just the sweetest, cheeriest girl ever."
"Aww, I can't wait to meet her! And your boyfriend too! He's coming tomorrow, right?" Melissa asked excitedly.
"No, not until Saturday," Sarah corrected.
"Do you think it's gonna go ok?" Melissa asked, noting Sarah's apparent lack of enthusiasm. "Are you and he still having, you know, issues?"
Sarah sighed. "I don't know; I wish it was that simple. I mean, he's a fantastic guy; we get along so well when we're together; plus he's a Major League ballplayer, for heaven's sake! What more could I ask for? But I don't know; I just feel like..."
A knock at their door interrupted the conversation there. "Oh, I wonder if that's her already!" Sarah said with surprise.
Sure enough, when Melissa opened the door, it was Hannah on the other side, along with Mrs. Benson, who had brought her down to the college on her way to visit an elderly family member. "Hey, Hannah!" Sarah greeted her, leaving her desk and giving the young blonde a warm hug. She gave Mrs. Benson a hug too, and introduced them to Melissa.
After chatting for a few minutes, Mrs. Benson left, and the three girls discussed their plans for the evening. There was a welcome and orientation meeting that Hannah was supposed to attend, but after that she would be free to go with Sarah and Melissa to their weekly bowling night with a few of their friends. "That sounds like a lot of fun!" Hannah exclaimed, with her usual enthusiasm.
The orientation meeting wasn't quite so fun, but Hannah did her best to listen, so she would know what to expect over the rest of the weekend. Unlike many of the students around her, who were just trying to decide between colleges, Hannah wasn't sure if she would be going to college at all after graduating. She didn't have much money - her father had left her a small sum in savings bonds, but not enough for the gigantic expense of a college education - and unlike her best friend Juliana, she didn't have excellent grades to provide her with academic scholarship opportunities. She felt like it might be a better idea to work for a while going to college, or maybe not even go at all. She didn't even really have a specific career path she was interested in yet. But the college preview event was free, so there was no reason for her not to at least check out the options Sarah's school offered.
Just as Sarah had when she first arrived at college, Hannah had a fantastic time out bowling with Sarah, Melissa, and their friends. She felt like she totally fit in with the entire group. And of course, they all quickly came to love the cute, bubbly highschooler just as Sarah knew they would.
The next morning, after attending another one of the recruiting events, Hannah headed over to the library to meet up with Sarah. Given the opportunity to attend one of Sarah's classes with her, Hannah had chosen her English class right before lunch. Sarah was sitting on her favorite bench outside, just finishing a phone conversation. She smiled and waved to Hannah as she approached. As soon as Sarah finished on the phone, she apologized, "Sorry, that was *hic* Nathan, he's gonna be c-*hic* coming in tomorrow morning."
Hannah hardly noticed Sarah's hiccups as she answered, "Oh cool! That will be so fun for you!"
"Yeah, it *huck* will," Sarah agreed, albeit with more conviction than she felt. "How was your meeting?"
Hannah shrugged. "It was ok. They just talked about the admissions process, money issues, stuff like that."
"Way to *hic* make it exciting," Sarah joked.
"I know, right? I'm excited about to going to class with you, though!"
Sarah put her arm around Hannah. "Me too!" she agreed with a smile and another big hiccup. This time Hannah giggled. "I don't know if the *huck* rest of the class will b-*hic* be excited about these hic-*ulk* hiccups, though," Sarah admitted. "I've *hic* had them practically all morning!"
"Usually I'm the girl with the hiccups," Hannah laughed. "I think I'll like it better this way for a change."
"Oh my word, Hannah, *huck* since I've been here I sw-*huck* swear I've been getting the hiccups way *hic* more than I did at home. *hic* Like, I was getting them a l-*hic* lot even before but this has *hulk* been crazy. Half the people *hic* in my account-*huck* accounting classes just *hic* know me as the 'hiccup girl'! I know *hic* how you feel now!"
"Oh wow," Hannah exclaimed. "It's a little awkward sometimes, isn't it?"
"No kidding. *huck* I mean, I love my hiccups so *hic* that's kind of different, but still! *hic-ulk* I'm amazed that you can go thr-*hic* through the day with constant *hic* hiccups and not even p-*hic* pay them any attention."
"After seventeen years, you get used to it whether you like them or not," Hannah teased.
Sarah laughed. "I guess so."
Hannah continued. "I don't know, for me it's like, I don't think of my hiccups as something embarrassing that I'm doing, like you know, burping or picking your nose. They're just part of me! So I just let them be, and if someone thinks I sound silly, well, I guess they can think that if they want."
"Hmm, I've n-*hic* never really thought of *huck* it that way," Sarah mused.
"Don't get me wrong though, every once in a while there are times where I just wish I could freakin' strangle them," Hannah added. "If, you know, you could strangle hiccups."
Sarah giggled again. "You're so cute, Hannah. *huck* But I've known you f-*hic* for years and I can't *huck* remember even one time when *huck* you seemed that upset *hic* by your hiccups."
"There's been a few times," Hannah insisted. "Trust me. Like this one time, after my dad died, I had to go to the courthouse for something or other and I had them so bad, everyone was getting annoyed and staring at me. That was awful."
"That does sound *hic* miserable," Sarah sympathized. "I don't think even *hic* I would like that."
"Oh or like, you remember Mr. Burnett, right?"
"Oh gosh, how could *hic* I forget?" Sarah laughed.
"Well, just a couple weeks ago I had the hiccups soooo bad during one of his math exams. Like the entire period, and they were super loud. And on top of that it was the fifth day in a row that I'd had them during his class. He was about ready to kill me! I think he would have had help, too!"
"Distracting much?" Sarah teased.
"No kidding! Why do you like having them so much, anyway?" Hannah asked.
"I don't know; I guess *hic* I'm just a little crazy that w-*huck* way?" They both laughed. "They're just so sp-*hic* spontaneous and funny," Sarah tried to explain. "I like it how *huck* they bounce my b-*hic* body so much! And like, I get *huck* the funniest resp-*huck* responses from people."
"I guess that's true, people have pretty funny reactions to my hiccups sometimes too," Hannah admitted. "But usually they just kinda stare."
"Your hiccups really are *hic* pretty adorable though, Hannah."
"I've heard that somewhere before. Maybe from your brother?" Hannah laughed.
"Well, he's *hic* kind of a biased s-*hulk* source," Sarah countered.
"What do you mean? Because he likes everyone's hiccups?"
Sarah shrugged. "Well, that too. *hic* But no, because he's so ri-*huck* ridiculously in love with *hic* you!"
Hannah grinned. "Oh, I know! He's so cute about it, too!"
In class, there were a few giggles when Sarah hiccupped loudly several times, but her hiccups stopped just a few minutes into the class period. Hannah listened attentively to the lecture, and when the teacher gave a short in-class writing assignment, she took a pencil and paper from her backpack and dutifully completed the assignment along with everyone else.
After the class, Hannah talked for a few minutes with the professor, who thanked Hannah for attending and complimented her on her work. "Visitors don't usually follow along and do my assignments," she noted. "Thanks for coming; you did great."
Hannah smiled. "Thanks, Dr. Byrd, I'm glad I was able to come to your class."
"Are you planning to attend here next year?" the teacher asked.
It was probably the fifteenth time someone had asked Hannah that question already, but she patiently explained, "I really don't know. I'd like to, but I honestly don't know what I would want to study. I feel like I ought to have a definite career in my life goals first. And I don't have a lot of money so I don't want to, like, get way in debt, you know? So it's going to be hard for me to decide."
Dr. Byrd nodded sympathetically. "It's a tough decision," she agreed. "Take your time to think and pray about it. If you do come to school here, you're definitely welcome in my class any time!"
"Thanks! I'll remember that!"
That evening, Sarah and Hannah went together to a concert by the college orchestra. Unlike Sarah, Hannah wasn't particularly interested in classical music, but she'd never been to a orchestra concert before so she decided to go along.
The first piece, an overture, was energetic and loud, which was a good thing since Hannah kept whispering questions to Sarah about various aspects of the music and the program. By the time the next piece got going, though, Hannah had lapsed into silence and just quietly enjoyed the music. She was glad she had come; classical music was pretty boring on the radio but it was interesting to see the orchestra in action.
Several minutes into the lengthy symphony, Hannah felt Sarah nudge her slightly with her shoulder. She turned to acknowledge her, but Sarah was still focused on the performance in front of them. Hannah assumed she must have just been changing position in her seat, until just moments later, she felt the same little bump again. This time Sarah responded even before she did. "Hannah, I have the hiccups!" she whispered. She hadn't been meaning to nudge Hannah at all!
Hannah smiled and tried not to giggle. "Oh no!" she whispered back.
No one would care if Sarah's body softly jerked back in her seat every now and then, and the music was loud enough that only their nearest neighbors would have noticed the occasional stifled hiccup sound from Sarah, but still she was concerned. "We're almost to the qu- quiet movement; I know I'm *hmk* not gonna be able to keep *hmk* these all silent!" she whispered.
Hannah, of course, had been in this type of situation more times than she could possibly remember. Looking to her left and right, she surveyed the chances of an easy exit, but with at least six or seven occupied seats blocking their access to the aisles on either side, that was not forthcoming. "You think people will mind very much?" she asked simply.
Not generally one to be embarrassed by her hiccups, Sarah still wasn't very comfortable. She had already gotten an unhappy look from the well-dressed man next to her. This was an orchestra concert, not a high school assembly. "I'm *hmk* afraid so," she admitted.
"Are you allowed to leave between the parts of the song - the 'movements' or whatever?" Hannah suggested.
The whispered exchange came to a sudden stop there as the first movement of the symphony ended. If she hadn't been distracted by Sarah's hiccups, Hannah probably would have started clapping and gotten them into even more trouble with their neighbors - it's bad form to applaud until the entire piece is finished - but as it was, the pause between movements was silent. As quietly as she could, Sarah breathed, "No, you're not *hmk* supposed to."
Hannah frowned. "Sit down in your chair a bit, and cover your mouth with your hand," she advised. "That's the only way I can ever keep them even close to quiet."
Sarah did as Hannah suggested, and it worked somewhat. Her body jerked more noticeably with every hiccup, but it was a little easier to avoid making much sound. Still, it was a somewhat odd position to be sitting in. Uncovering her mouth for a moment to whisper again, she joked, "I *hmk* feel like a twelve-year-old!"
Once Sarah overcame the initial awkwardness, it was actually a rather entertaining challenge to try to keep her hiccups quiet through the concert. Several times a loud one slipped out, and she got a number of disapproving glances, but Sarah took it in stride and Hannah just tried not to laugh. It was pretty fun not being the one with the hiccups, for a change.
Finally, after what the two girls would have sworn was the longest symphony ever composed, there was an intermission. The applause had barely died down and the lights come on when Sarah turned to Hannah, finally able to speak - and hiccup - normally. "Oh my *huck* word, Hannah!" she exclaimed.
After trying to be quiet so long herself, Hannah just laughed and laughed.
Before leaving for the intermission period, the man next to them commented to Sarah, "You better get rid of those before they start the music again."
"I'm so *huck* sorry!" she gushed. "I couldn't h-*hic* help it!"
The man just walked off, none too pleased.
"Has *hic* this ever happened to y-*hulk* you?" Sarah asked Hannah.
"Well, you know I've had the hiccups in church before," Hannah noted. "Lots of times."
"True."
"I never knew how ridiculous I must look and sound, though!" Hannah laughed.
"Hey, *huck* watch it!" Sarah teased.
Hannah giggled. "That was awesome; you did a way better job staying quiet than I'm ever able to."
"By the *huck* end I felt like I w-*hic* was about to explode! *hic* But I better get out of here, you can s-*hilk* stay if you want."
"What, and leave you alone with those hiccups?"
As luck would have it, Sarah's hiccups stopped before they even made it back to the dormitory. Still, rather than return to the concert, they continued on to Sarah's room. After recovering from the humorous incident, the girls got ready for bed, and then just talked about the day. Hannah knew a lot more about college than she had before, but wasn't any more certain about where her educational future lay. She sat with Melissa on her bed, discussing her options.
"I'm not even sure that I really need to go to college, or what I'd study if I did," Hannah explained. "I mean, what I really want to do is be a wife and mother someday, you know? It's hard to get a degree in that! But then, I want to be able to support myself too, and I would love to have a job where I could help people somehow."
"If you do go to college, do you want to come here?" Melissa asked.
Hannah frowned. "I don't know. I'm sure I'd have a great time here and learn a lot, but it's so expensive, you know? It's like I told Sarah's English teacher; I don't want to be in debt for the rest of my life."
"Do you think maybe you'll work for a while first, like Sarah did?" Melissa suggested.
"Yeah, that might help. I'll also have to think about what Chris is doing too, though. He's thinking about taking classes at the community college to start with, but he might come here instead; he doesn't really know what he's doing either. And I'd hate to make a big decision like this only to find out he's going to be somewhere completely different."
"But you can't just wait and plan your life around him," Melissa argued. "Plus we're not that far from your home; if he came here and you didn't, or vice-versa, you could still be together and see each other; it wouldn't be the end of the world, right?"
"I -- I guess so," Hannah said hesitantly. "I don't think I could be apart from him even like that, though. I guess it sounds kind of silly, but I don't know, it's --"
"It's not silly at all, Hannah," Sarah interrupted, turning from her desk just a few feet away. "Yeah, we're only like an hour and a half from home, but it's important to be able to see each other as often as you possibly can. Especially when it's always been that way, to lose that is a change that's really hard to handle."
"That's true," Melissa agreed, "But it's not impossible, either; Brent and I were long-distance all last year while he was here and I was still in academy, and we survived. It was hard sometimes though, it really was. Sarah, you and Nathan have been apart for a while too, haven't you?"
"Yeah, that's why I said to avoid it," Sarah sighed.
"It's been pretty hard for you and him?" Hannah asked.
"It has. But that's ok; we're not talking about me and Nathan. He and I will figure out what we're doing tomorrow."
Hannah could tell Sarah was avoiding the topic, but still she asked sympathetically, "No really, Sarah, what's the matter?"
Sarah took a deep breath. "It's awful," she finally admitted. "Well, I guess that's not really true. It's not awful; we don't fight a lot or anything. It's just so -- so empty. When we're together we're perfect; we have fun, we get along, there's always so much to talk about and so much to do. But when we're apart like this, we talk on the phone or we text or Skype or whatever, but it's like we hardly even know each other. I mean, I have better conversations with Mark in accounting class than I do with Nathan half the time."
Always one to search for a bright side, Hannah pointed out, "You must be pretty glad he's coming this weekend."
"I know, I should be. I mean, I am, but -- it's just for a couple days, you know? And then he'll have to go back to Saint Louis or Memphis or wherever they're sending him next and we'll be miserable again for months."
"So him coming just makes it more clear how much you're missing in your relationship when you're apart?" Melissa asked.
"Yeah, you could say that," Sarah said. "It makes me question everything, too. Sure we get along so well in person, but are we really right for each other if we can't handle being apart? I get along well with practically every guy, as long as he's not a total jerk; am I being stupid to hang on to what I have with Nathan through all this?"
Melissa tried to say something, but Sarah cut her off as she continued, the emotion clearly rising in her voice. "Sometimes I think I ought to just forget about Nathan and enjoy myself here with you and all my friends. It makes me so frustrated. I don't want to sound conceited but there's at least a dozen guys who'd date me tomorrow if I let them."
Despite the seriousness of the conversation, Melissa whispered to Hannah, "She ain't lying about that."
Sarah had to smile for a moment, before she continued in a calmer, softer tone. She wiped a tear from her eye. "I must sound like such a bitch, whining to y'all about my problems when you're talking about your plans, Hannah. I'm sorry. And don't get me wrong, I do love Nathan, like you wouldn't believe."
"It's ok," Hannah consoled her. "I've got a long time to decide what I'm doing with my life; relationship problems don't give you so long to decide what to do about them."
"Yeah, and that pretty much sucks," Sarah commented wryly.
"But isn't baseball season over now?" Hannah asked. "Why can't Nathan just come down here for a while, for you?"
"Ugh, that's part of it, too. I've been like: 'I can get through this; the season is almost over,' but he hurt his shoulder right before the playoffs, so they want him to play a bit longer to make sure it's fully rehabbed. We don't know yet when and where that's going to be."
"Oh, so he doesn't even know what he's doing yet?"
"Nope. And in the meantime, I'll still be sitting here trying to be a good long-distance girlfriend, which I obviously suck at, and yet still enjoy time with my friends and all, too. Oh, and taking classes I don't really even like. Yeah, don't take accounting, Hannah; you'd hate it."
Hannah smiled. "Thanks, I'd figured that one out on my own. Why don't you change your major to something different, if you don't like it?"
"Come join me in nursing!" Melissa suggested.
"No way, Melissa!" Sarah exclaimed. "And yes I probably will change, but Mom and Dad want me to stick it out for the rest of the semester."
"So you have to be apart from Nathan, but you feel like you're wasting your time while you're here because you aren't even going where you want to go with your life?" Hannah asked.
"Well, I'm --" Sarah paused for a long time. Melissa started to say something, but Hannah quieted her.
Finally, Sarah's expression changed; she almost looked relieved. "That's exactly it, Hannah," she finally declared. "I'm totally wasting my time. I can't be the girlfriend I want to be because we can't seem to make long-distance work, I can't be the friend I want to be because I'm all discouraged about Nathan, and I don't even like what I'm studying. Thank you so much, Hannah. You too, Melissa; y'all are amazing."
Hannah and Melissa looked at one another, puzzled. "What do you mean, Sarah?" Melissa finally asked.
"I didn't really say anything besides what you'd already said," Hannah admitted, equally confused.
Sarah shook her head, smiling. "Sorry, I guess I just focus so much on what I want that sometimes I don't stop to figure out what the problem really is."
Hardly had Sarah finished her sentence when she was surprised by a massive hiccup that practically threw her back in her chair. A few more quickly followed, as the three girls all laughed. "Again, Sarah?" Hannah giggled.
Sarah grinned. "Seriously Hannah, *hic* what have you d-*huck* done to me to-*huck* today?"
* * * * *
As he gathered the last of his things from the friend's apartment in Saint Louis where he had intermittently lived for the past several weeks, Nathan didn't feel any of Sarah's cheer. Normally he would have been ecstatic with excitement, practically skipping down the stairs to pack his truck. But tonight he felt melancholy. Being apart from Sarah was hard on him, too: and just when he thought he was finally going to be able to spend a nice long period of uninterrupted time with her, the call had come. The organization wanted him to get some extra game action in, and demonstrate that his recovery from a shoulder injury was complete, by taking an assignment in a winter league.
Nathan loved baseball. How could he not? It was his dream; his life. But Sarah was his dream girl, and sometimes he resented how much his pursuit of baseball success kept him apart from her. It seemed to never end: first Memphis, then playing with the Cardinals, then staying around in Saint Louis through the early weeks of October to support his teammates in the playoffs. And now, he would have to tell her that he would soon be leaving her yet again, this time for the most unlikely destination yet. What would Sarah say? What could he say?
He found himself still struggling with what to say as he walked alone with Sarah across her college's idyllic campus late the next morning. Plus, he'd had the hiccups most of the morning, so that made saying just about anything a bit of a challenge.
"You're so cute when you have the hiccups like this!" Sarah giggled, her attitude still as inexplicably upbeat as it had been at the end of the girls' conversation the night before. "Just talk to me; I don't care if you hiccup," she teased.
"That's *hup* good, because I've had them off and *hup* on since right after I left Saint L-*hup* Louis," he admitted.
"Oh gosh Nathan, all night?" Sarah asked incredulously.
"Just sometimes. They'd *hup* last for an hour or so, then be g- gone for, I don't know, like twenty or thi- thirty minutes. They kind of hurt now *hup* after having them so much. Kept me from dozing *hup* off, though!"
Sarah was still a little concerned. "You don't usually get hiccups like that, Nathan; are you ok?"
"Yeah, maybe it's j-*huck* just from having so much on my *hup* mind," he guessed.
"What is it, honey? Just tell me; I'm ready for anything."
Nathan was puzzled. "What do y- you mean, 'ready for anything'?"
"Hannah and Melissa and I talked for a while about stuff last night, and something Hannah said really just changed my whole outlook on what's going on. I'd been looking at it all wrong. Well, maybe not 'wrong', per se, but not focusing on what's really important to me. I've been doing what I think I'm supposed to do rather than what I need to do. And now I know what I need to do."
Nathan still didn't understand. He was actually a little bit worried. "What do you n- need to do?"
"No, no," Sarah stopped him. "First you tell me what you need to do."
He hung his head, but it jerked right back up with another hiccup. "I got the call about the winter *hup* leagues," he began. "They found a spot for me. *huck* They want me to rehab and event- eventually play there, starting three weeks from *hup* now."
"Where is 'there'?" Sarah pressed.
"Mazatlán."
"Maza-what?"
"It's a city in the Mexican win- winter league. Like more than six hundred miles *hup* just from the border."
"Mexico?" Sarah asked, incredulous.
"Mexico."
Sarah closed her eyes and said nothing for several minutes. Nathan gently held her, with only his stubborn, if mostly stifled, hiccups punctuating the silence. Finally she looked up into his eyes. "What's this Mexican team called?" she asked, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.
"Los Venados. The D-*hup* Deer," Nathan answered, confused by the strange question. "Why do you ask?"
"The Deer?" Sarah giggled.
"Hey, it could be worse; *hup* one of the teams down there is c- called the Tomato Growers."
Sarah laughed. Her laugh was so beautiful, Nathan thought. He was going to miss her even more being so far away. In Saint Louis he'd been able to fly her up a few times on weekends; there was no way he'd be able to fly her deep into Mexico for a weekend. On top of that, she was acting so weird, talking about what she 'needed to do', that he was afraid she was about to break up with him or something.
"Well, I'm going to be the Deer's biggest fan!" Sarah finally announced, through her laughter.
Nathan chuckled too. "I doubt you'll be able to *huck* catch many of our games on *hup* ESPN," he joked.
Sarah shrugged. "I won't have to." She looked into his eyes again. "I'm going with you."
Nathan stared at her, mouth agape. "Are you serious? What about your classes? Your tuition? Your friends? And what would your parents --"
Sarah put her finger over his mouth. "I'm going with you. And we're leaving Monday; we may as well have some fun on the way! You have your truck ready; I'll take care of all that."
"That would be amazing, Sarah, but I don't want to -- I mean, are you sure about this?" He asked, tears starting to well up in the corners of his eyes.
Sarah just smiled and nodded. Then she threw her arms around his neck, and they kissed. They kissed passionately, repeatedly, like never before. Those teardrops found their way out of Nathan's eyes and into Sarah's light brown hair as it pressed against his cheek. She cried too, harder than she had in years. It felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off their shoulders, never to return. They could have stayed there for hours; perhaps they did, who knows? All they knew was that nothing, no one, was going to keep them apart this time.
* * * * *
Sarah and Nathan decided to keep their shocking change of plans secret until they saw Sarah's family on Sunday afternoon. They were coming down for a short visit, as well as to pick up Hannah, and Sarah felt like that would be the best time to break the news to everyone.
Before the family went out to eat together Sunday afternoon, Sarah took her father aside for a moment. "Dad, I need to talk to you about something," she explained hesitantly.
"Sure, what is it, sweetie?" he asked.
Sarah shook her head. "No, I mean alone. Can we go outside for a few minutes?"
Outside, father and daughter walked arm in arm across the carefully-manicured lawn, soaking in the warm sun and the pastoral scent of freshly-cut grass. Neither spoke for a few minutes. Sarah felt so much more comfortable away from her brother and sister's voices, away from Melissa and Hannah, from her mom's inevitably disapproving ear. Still, it took some courage to tell even him. Where could she even begin?
"Dad," she finally spoke. "Nathan and I, well, we -- he has to -- I'm going to..." she struggled to find a way to explain.
"What is it, Sarah?" he asked, ever patient, but also concerned.
"I'm sorry; I feel so guilty. I guess I should have told Mom first," she lamented. "She'd be super mad at me but at least I wouldn't feel so bad then!"
Mr. Beloit chuckled. "Your mother and I love you both no matter what," he assured her.
"I know; I love you too," she said, hugging him more tightly as the pace of their walk slowed nearly to a stop. Finally she admitted simply, "I'm leaving school; Nathan and I are going to Mexico for a few months."
He raised an eyebrow. "Mexico?" he asked, just as Sarah had when Nathan first mentioned the assignment.
Now the explanation poured out. "Oh Daddy, I'm sorry, I know you two won't understand. It's just, I still don't like my accounting classes here; I've told you that. And I can't stand being away from Nathan; it nearly destroys our relationship every time we're apart. They want him to go play in the Mexican league pretty soon, and I just can't be away from him like that again. I'm not getting anywhere being here taking accounting anyway, I feel like I'm totally wasting my time. I have to be with him. And no, we're not getting married; I'm not pregnant; it's nothing like that. We're just made to be together, you know?" She finally paused. "Mom's going to kill me, isn't she?"
Mr. Beloit stroked his chin thoughtfully. "No, your mother will still love you. She'll be upset, but that's just because she wants the best for you."
"I'm sorry. I know we probably sound crazy. It must be impossible to understand," Sarah acknowledged.
"No, not at all," Mr. Beloit corrected.
"It's not?"
"I did the same thing once," he explained.
Sarah was incredulous. "You did? What do you mean?"
Mr. Beloit shook his head. "If I tell you about it now, they're going to come looking for us about nightfall, asking what happened to lunch."
Sarah laughed. "Short version?"
"I'll tell you about it another time," he promised. "What I did isn't really important. What's important is, just make sure you don't do things that you'll regret someday."
Sarah hung her head. "So you're saying I shouldn't go waste some of the best part of my life like you did?"
"No, I'm not saying that," he countered. "Nothing is a waste if you learn from it. I learned lessons in that time that have served me very well ever since. Just try to learn your lessons the easy way if you can, not the hard way."
Sarah nodded. "I see what you mean." Then she hugged him yet again. "I love you so much, Daddy; you're amazing. I don't know what I'd do without you. I'll miss you while we're gone!"
They shared a long embrace. "I'll miss you too, sweetie," he whispered.
"Could you do one more thing for me?" Sarah asked sheepishly, through her tears.
"Of course," he agreed.
"Could you tell Mom for me?"
* * * * *
As Sarah had expected, Mom didn't take the news so well. Melissa was shocked, and Chris and Amanda didn't know what to say. But as they all said their goodbyes, Hannah was relentlessly upbeat as always. "Thanks for letting me stay with you this weekend," she gushed, giving Sarah a tight hug. "But seriously Sarah," she asked. "Was it something I said?"
Sarah laughed. "It was; it was."
"I don't understand; I really didn't say anything you didn't say yourself."
"That's what made it so perfect," Sarah explained. "You just reminded me that I've been wasting my time away from what matters to me. And I'm not going to do that any more."
"Well I hope you two have a great time together!" Hannah said, giving Nathan a hug also.
Sarah smiled. "Thanks, Hannah. You're a jewel. You better still call me, ok?"
"You know I will! How else am I going to practice my Spanish?" Hannah joked.
"Oh my word; you're going to have to teach me Spanish," Sarah admitted. "I took French, you know."
"Here's a word to start with," Hannah said, grinning. "Hipo. It's my nickname in Spanish class."
"Hiccups?" Sarah guessed.
"Good job!" Hannah giggled.
"Hipo," Sarah repeated. "Thanks, I have a feeling I'll need that one!"